The Return Stroke....

During this past week or so, I have witnessed some amazing displays of lightening. And in the midst of it I learned something that has truly blown me away!

http://youtu.be/myT0KftNt1Y

More to come!  Enjoy!

444 before...

I have been on a journey of understanding why I encounter the series 444, everywhere I go...and yep, I mean everywhere. I was searching for a gmail early this morning and typed the subject name to find this email and it was #444....uh-huh. I explained in an earlier blog how this happens frequently and gave many examples. And in my last entry, I posted a picture I took of a receipt that I had with the amount $4.44 and it was picture 444/444 on my iPhone....go figure.

As I searched the scripture and spent some time in quiet reflection, I began to have revelation into some of what this means.

Upon doing some research, I ended in the Old Testament book of Nehemiah.  And discovered that the wall project with the rebuilding of Jerusalem was completed around 444BC.  This was quite meaningful to me.

I have since felt impressed that this year 2012, is a year of significant Kingdom Authority in the church.  This is a year when there will be a positioning of persons within the Kingdom of God.  I believe that God is moving people strategically to be where they need to be "for such a time as this".  

It is during the reconstruction project of the Jerusalem wall that we see an amazing thing take place.  During the month of Nisan (the month of redemption...and also when the passover is celebrated) Nehemiah, the cup bearer to Artaxerxes, king of Babylon, was repositioned and sent to Jerusalem for the sole purpose of rebuilding the walls around Jerusalem.

Now as a governor for the project, he was responsible to see that this project get completed as correctly and expediently as possible.  In chapter 2:11, we see that this project was put on Nehemiah's heart by God's design.  And this project would take both great wisdom and skill, but there were several challenges that lay in wait for him.

1)  The people of the land were depressed and demoralized by their neighbors.  The remnant of Israel had been like outcasts and were in great trouble and disgrace.  chp 1:3

2) The walls had been torn down, stone by stone and the frames had been burnt up.  And with limited resources, the rebuild would require great creativity and skill. chp 1:3, chp 3

3) Time was against the people.   They were faced with opposition on 3 forces:  The Samaritans, The Ammonites, and The Arabs.  These ones ridiculed, tormented and attacked the Israelites whenever they could in an attempt to halt the reconstruction.  chp 2:19, chp 4

4) And in the midst of the project of wall restoration, he had to focus his energies on providing for the people.  chp 5

In each case, Nehemiah operated with wisdom:

-When faced with the troubled people, he assigned those to help govern and assist all who were in the land.  They were all tasked with serving and encouraging one another.  This was first addressed by immediately assessing the damage to the wall and assigning certain ones to building portions of the wall.

-With the torn down stones and frames, he immediately engaged all the Israelites in the area to come and work at rebuilding.

-To address the threat of the enemies of Israel, he stationed watchers 24/7 who would guard the wall and fitted each laborer with a weapon and a tool so they could fight or work as required.

-Lastly, he demonstrated wisdom in helping facilitate justice for the people.

I believe that the church is symbolically in this time frame when the "wall is being rebuilt" and authority is being restored to the body.  We are being positioned in a season where we are utterly dependent on God and must find ourselves working together to see the Kingdom Come and His Will Be Done.

I believe that just like in Nehemiah's day, we are seeing plans and strategies being revealed and we are being called to work and fight for the Kingdom.  And as we are placed and work together, we will see amazing things happen.

"Therefore I stationed some of the people behind the lowest points of the wall at the exposed places, posting them by families, with their swords, spears and bows. After I looked things over, I stood up and said to the nobles, the officials and the rest of the people, “Don’t be afraid of them. Remember the Lord, who is great and awesome, and fight for your families, your sons and your daughters, your wives and your homes.” Nehemiah 4:13-14

All in all, when it was completed the wall rebuilding project took 52 days.  And through God's design, the wall and the people were restored.  I think this is the common theme between Genesis 4-Revelation 19.  We see the redemptive work of God to restore us to himself.  And I pray that during this season we may see things restored to us that we thought were lost.

a look back...for those who know...Hollow Man (a poem)

I really felt that I needed to post this poem from my past. This was written at a time when I was feeling the lowest and most distant I think I could have gone from the loving arms of my Savior. I pray and hope that this will reach some soul tonight. It is a sober and bleak poem, but one that defined how I felt at the time. I couldn't see it then, but Jesus was there, with me...in the darkest place.

There is hope in Christ for those wrestling with addiction, for those bound with sexual sin and sexual brokenness.  You may be crying out for help in the quiet place where no one else sees. There is One who sees your tears, feels your desperate cries and loves you with an everlasting love. He feels exactly what you feel and knows you at the deepest levels!

Hollow Man

And as I stare, longing yet empty handed still. 
I have desperately wanted the thing I dared not pursue,
The passion that I had so forcefully declined and the love that I was sure I did not deserve.
This shadow of heartache now falls; 
Slowly at first, creeping, quietly consuming every path it crosses.

Inclined to run, I cannot;
Paralysis has gripped every muscle, 
And I am hopeless to escape this consuming blot.
Eluded, robbed and feeling like a scorned lover,
I admit my own personal defeat.


I am helpless to fight anymore,
What I have been all along;
I clump in a pile and fade to a posture of release.
And as this tunnel of darkness surrounds me I feel hollow; 
Empty inside.
Devoid inside and out, 
I am simply a shell of a man.
Consumed now, I have become a thing, 
That I have been fearful to define; 
To feel...to accept...to love.

And I am lost, like a child in a wood!
I can longer tell if my eyes are open or closed; 
So real, this darkness has surrounded me. 
It is me!
I can feel it, wrapping its coldness around me, 
Touching my skin, filling each breath...making me one of it's own. Dark!
To the deepest part of me now it spills,
And I feel hopeless to fight any longer...
....I am a Hollow Man!

...the turning aside

So Moses said, “I must step aside and see this great thing, why the bush is not being burned up." The Lord saw him step aside and look. And God called to him from inside the bush, saying, "Moses, Moses!" Moses answered, "Here I am."Exodus 3:3-4.

God is ALWAYS speaking! It may be that He speaks with a whisper on the wind, like to Elijah or he may speak with an impression, through a memory, a book, a movie, a beautiful progression of chords on the piano. But He most assuredly speaks!

But do we listen?

Did it take 80 years for Moses to be in a place where he was willing to listen? Maybe. After he left Egypt he lived on the backside of the desert for 40 years. He had been a sheep herder for most of that time for his father-in-law. And I feel pretty sure that He had been to Mt. Horeb many times.

I feel like I am just getting to a place in life where I am beginning to feel like I have impressions from the Lord, and where I am sensing He is leading me, as I call out to Him. It is a truly wonderful thing!

Monday March 19th, I was abruptly awakened, for the second time in a month, but this time by the whining of coyotes near our house. After I had gone outside to make a racket to scare them away, I laid back down and looked at the time. It was 4:20am. (I had a 4:20am experience on Feb 27, 2012.) It was again, one of those moments when I was sure God was speaking to me. And just then, I suddenly remembered that just before I was awakened, that I had been dreaming.

In this dream, I was looking at a map of Brazil. I stood over a small table as the map laid open in front of me. I was busy studying the map...plotting a course. On the map was a label "A" and "B". I somehow knew that I was trying to get from point "A" to "B". I realized that dense rain forest lay between the two locations...and as I stood pondering, that's when I was awakened.

I rolled over in my bed and began to pray. I asked God to give me understanding as to what was happening. And that's when it happened. The words "And he turned aside." popped into my mind. This reminded me of Moses in his wilderness experience, so I found myself reading Exodus 3 to try and gain some understanding.

And this is what I've concluded so far. God is always speaking...through experiences, relationships, events, and common everyday stuff. But too often we are too busy to notice. We have so occupied our lives that we hardly notice the time in between breakfast and dinner...and much less the time as we rest. And in our current age, we have so many preoccupations; FB, Twitter, TV, Movies, Texting, Xbox, Radio, Podcasts, etc... and we have become obsessively consumed with activity to the point of Narcissism. We have settled for a warm fuzzy that is seemingly enough to fill the void...and we become comfortable with a superficial relationship with God.

But I think God is calling us to deeper. I think He desires to engage us just like the child Samuel in the temple, Elijah the Prophet in the desert, Daniel in the Lion's Den, and Moses at the Burning Bush.

He loves us so much to continue to engage us at whatever level we choose to take...because He wants to be near us. He will choose to be near us in our fast-paced, fast food lives and is looking for the moment...the moment when He can catch our attention. He is looking for the opportunity to distract us in such a way that we say, "What's this amazing thing...."

And in that Holy moment, when we TURN aside, I believe He will be right there, noticing and we will be stunned at that moment when He engages us at the heart level. It's pretty sweet!

Even now God, I turn aside, quiet my heart, and look to you. I wait for you to engage me...here...now! Come!

James 4:8 "Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you."

...when a whisper roars

My wife and I were at a concert the other night in downtown Wichita. During the event, the singer/songwriter/conductor asked if anyone had heard of the "Butterfly Effect". I had to admit that in essence I had heard of this, but knew nothing about the theory behind it.

So what is the Butterfly Effect, for those who may not know? Essentially, it is the idea that the brush of a butterfly's wing on one side of the world could bring about gigantic change on the other side of the world.

Immediately, the Holy Spirit quickened to me that this is the same effect that is seen in the spirit when we pray the Lord's pray...."Your Kingdom Come, Your Will Be Done."

And that is pretty profound to me. The God of Heaven takes very seriously our prayer, even in the quiet moments to bring about Gigantic changes in the Earth.

It is an establishment of His Kingdom, His Government, His Lordship over all creation. And He chooses to partner with us to bring about these earth-shaking, powerful changes.

Now that is AMAZING!

...June 26, 2009

I had a random recall today that took me back to almost three years ago. I don't know really where this is going, but I recall how important this was at the time.

Do you remember where, when and what you were doing when you heard news that Michael Jackson had passed away? I was at home watching the news and the time stamp that marked my mind when the news broke was 3:15 pm. It was not anything momentous at the time, except to say that like the rest of the world, I was mesmerized.

In what seemed like a split second a mass of thoughts flooded my mind:

-this man had left an indelible mark on the world and across generations of listeners.

-his world was rocked by scandle as he was accursed of sexual activity with small children.

-he had such a troubled life that could not be resisted (like watching a train wreck happening).

....and so on.

And as I sat there with my rapid fire thoughts, I found myself judging and even condemning the man as if I had room to point. And at that same time, God dealt directly with my heart. I felt strongly impressed to look up John 3:15 (matching the time).

Well sure, that should be easy enough, right?!? I certainly was familiar with the passage of Nicodemus visiting Jesus at night and had memorized John 3:16 at an early age...but what was this about. So I grabbed my Bible and opened to the verse. What happened next both humbled me and cause me to call out for forgiveness. The verse reads:

"...that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life." (John 3:15 NKJV)

Wow...okay, now God had my attention. I was shocked! And immediately came an impression, "What is it to you if I choose to save Michael Jackson in the final moments?". And I became completely compelled to believe that in the final minutes of life that Jesus had interacted with Michael with such love and compassion as to have saved him. And that Michael, may have called out in his dying breath for God to save him.  I do not truly know, but Father God is a pretty big God.  

I'm still stunned when I think about it.

Jesus made it clear in scripture that it was the sick that needed him, not that he had come to call the unrighteousness to repentance...Luke 5:32. And as dramatically, Jesus interacted with a dying thief, while he hung on a cross and promised him life in paradise. Wow!

So what's my point? Simply this...

There are a lot of wounded people around us that need to know the light of His presence. And it could very well be that words, love, influence and relationship could be making it possible for us to impact someone else for eternity. It would be easy to judge and conclude what we see in the natural, but we might be surprised by what God hears and sees in the heart.

Thank you Father for grace!

...when expectation meets reality...

So where do you find yourself today? I have gone through a few challenges in the past 24 hours, past week, past month...mainly how do I respond to the HS when he is changing paradigms in my life. It's been tough, but good!

I feel like I've been in a season where Yahweh has been establishing his leadership in my life. It has been a time of allowing the HS to examine my heart, motives, loves and surrendering them to Him. It has been a time of burning up the wood, hay and stubble. I Corinthians 3 reveals some of what I'm talking about. "11 For no other foundation can anyone lay than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ. 12 Now if anyone builds on this foundation with gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, straw, 13 each one’s work will become clear; for the Day will declare it, because it will be revealed by fire; and the fire will test each one’s work, of what sort it is. 14 If anyone’s work which he has built on it endures, he will receive a reward. 15 If anyone’s work is burned, he will suffer loss; but he himself will be saved, yet so as through fire."

I don't know that I can communicate clearly the swell of emotions I feel in my heart...as I've said before...It's been tough, but good!

I described this to my friend Becca Potter awhile back, by saying that I feel like I've been in a season of "pregnancy" and that many times in the past I have failed to trust God at the HOW in my life. And that I felt, as I looked back, that those moments were like a "still birth". Becca presented a different perspective that surprised me when she said it. She wondered if those seasons were times that God has used to stretch me. To prepare me. Just like a woman's body changes to allow for the birth of a beautiful new baby. And in fact weren't still births at all.

And this has stayed with me...swirling just upon the surface of these hard times. And it has been a sweet reminder to me. I went on a fiery walk at midnight the other night as I was processing things with my wife, family and Abba. I was being stretched to what I felt was a breaking point. And as the walk ended about an hour later, I had a sweet revelation from the Lord. What do I want to hear from Him. What are the most important words that could rest so sweetly on my ears? I reflected on the parable of the talents. And prayed out that I may be found faithful to the Father with every aspect of my life. I want to be a wise one who will have loved Him completely! I want to find the secret treasures of His heart...the gold, silver and precious stones! I want to continue to wrestle with this "self" and allow Him to work in me, out of a place of weakness.

But most importantly...I long beyond all things to hear the words, "WELL DONE, GOOD AND FAITHFUL ONE!"

That would be an awesome reality!