dense like a forest...which is justlikecamping (I'll explain sometime)

"...and when He was seated His disciples came to Him. ² Then He opened His mouth and taught them..." Matt. 5:1-2

So far, I feel like I'm downloading Windows 8 or have the new iPad3, and they aren't even out yet, so that's saying a lot!

I have been convinced of one thing lately, and that is...I must KNOW Jesus Christ. And knowing involves interaction from me and him. So this is what he has been showing me this week. On Sunday I heard a message online from my good friend Timothy David Miller, speaking from Matthew 4. It was very good!

Well I didn't intentionally go there on Monday morning, but God took me there, when I was abruptly awakened at 4:20, when my German Shorthair proceeded to bound on me. She usually sleeps on the floor by the foot of the bed...but something had surprised her and I immediately found her standing on top of me. I noticed that she was obviously shaken when I got her off of me and onto the carpet. I glanced at my clock to see what time it was...4:20. Ugghh! I laid back down, but could not get back to sleep.

What was that about?

Like Samuel, I tried to go back to sleep, but to no avail...I couldn't shake it. I think an angel must have poked her, because I needed to get up for an encounter with God. So, instead of rolling over, I just laid there praying. And what came next was amazing to me. I had an impression to search 4:20 out in the Gospels. And that began to take me where I am today.

I will let you read it for yourself, but what stood out to me, and impacted me so clearly was Matt. 4:20. Meditating on Matthew 4 and 5 have now transfixed me.

In the context of Matthew 4, Jesus has a wilderness experience, a 40 day fast and a visit from the devil. And ends the chapter by calling out the disciples as he begins his ministry years. Then 5:1 happens. Mostly I have read past it so quickly that I've missed it, but have wondered before about one thought...so let me share...

"...and when He was seated His disciples came to Him. ² Then He opened His mouth and taught them..."

Of all phrases to put in there. Of course he was going to speak...that's one way we communicate. How else would he impart truth to them. And that's when it struck me. I guess he didn't have to. He is God. He could have done a number of things.

-He could have had ministry time and laid hands on them and they could have ROFL'd getting healed of junk in their lives.

-He could have written a letter and filled all in the blanks of their mundane living.

-He could have done some amazing miracle to wow and astonish them, convincing them He was the one to follow.

-He could have done like David and sang a beautiful ballad; imparting truth.

-He could make a divine moment for them all and open Heaven and let them know all the truths and mysteries of the universe.

..but for some reason he choose to sit and teach them. I know it is about relationship, but there's more. The first part of the verse says that after he was seated, that the disciples came to him. Now that's awesome!

So I see 2 major truths in this one line...

I COME and HE SPEAKS!

There's an awesome mystery in our willingness to come to him, in a posture of rest (sitting) that allows us to connect with the One who holds the Words of Wisdom, as He speaks truth into us. And that is precious to me.

God is speaking...do I hear his voice? I choose first to come and listen!

a mysterious 444

Here is one photo proof of the amazing 444 mystery. This was taken Friday Feb 17th, 2012...more to follow.

....so what's the significance of...

Deja Vu? Coincidence? Planets lined up? The Age of Aquarius? Probably not, but I just gotta know. I can't be the only one that experiences this stuff.

I have clearly been in a place of seeing, hearing, reading, experiencing, etc the numbers 444.

I will be out at the store and grab a box of something or whatever and the price is $4.44.
A movie will end and I look down at my iPhone to check the time and yep it's 4:44.
I will drive past a billboard and glace at it randomly and it promotes the address 444 ____.
I punch the clock from work, with a timestamp...4:44.
I wake up in the middle of the night to get a drink of water, 4:44.
I pay a bill for $4.44.
In 2012, my birthday was on the 4th day, and I turned 44. 444.
Today I watched a YouTube video that my friend Taylor Pool posted on FB and yep, you guessed it. It was 4.44 minutes long.

This "random" 444 has been happening a ton to me for about 4 years. (ha...you though I'd say 4 yrs, 4 months and 4 days....444...nope). It is the craziest series of numbers that I've ever experienced in my life.

And I simply shared about 8 different times that this has happened. But I would venture to say, it happens about 3-4 times a week. Maybe even 444 times to date...haha.

I know what I think God is saying to me through these encounters, but I'm wondering if others experience these same things. I don't place a lot of stock in numbers, I'm not going to go play the lotto, unless it's for 444 million :).

And except for a Biblical meaning, you know like the number 7 equating with perfection, Daniel and his prophetic dream, 666 and more from the book of Revelation, even Gideon and his 300 men, etc...I believe numbers are important to God, but I don't really try to develop a theology concerning them. And maybe my mind plays a little bit of a trick on me with the clock time. But I became convinced a long time ago that God was speaking to me. There was too much of a "coincidence" happening.

Anyone else find themselves in the same place? Numbers, colors, objects? I had a similar thing happen for years over a dime. I would find dimes, face up, in the most seemingly randomly, isolated places.

I believe strongly that God speaks to us all the time. He is intimately and intently involved in our lives. And probably one joy of his heart is to speak in mysteries and riddles. So back to my original thought.

When, where, and how is God speaking to you? He is still speaking!

...hates others...ouch...harsh!

Five years ago, I bought an album that has meant a lot to me. Ian Mcintosh, "Awakened". I believe the HS knew the impact that it would have on my life, especially the smolder of my heart. I have listened to this album more than I can count, but the lyrics jumped from the song into my soul yesterday...and the simple words pierced me. Was it the symbolism? Maybe some of that...as it was a cold and snowy evening and the fire in the fireplace warmed me. I believe it probably was timing. The HS ministered to me as the words rolled around in my mind and soaked down into the recesses of my heart. Let me share them with you. http://youtu.be/_evxigAcEJo

"The faintest touch from the One I long for
warms me like a hot fire on a cold Winter night

I am His and He is mine, I am His and He is mine
I am fully loved!

This is the One I long for, He gives me the reason to live
In His arms He holds me

I am His and He is mine, I am His and He is mine
I am fully loved!

You're all I need
There's no other love I know it's You."

I can see that the Father has had me on a journey of restoring the 1st Commandment, "You shall love the Lord your God, with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength" in my life. As I think back, He has been bringing me through seasons of great repentance and restoration; teaching and training; fullness and thankfulness. I have seen my heart grow and endure the battles of living behind my eyes. And deep love is being restored...to the places that seemed dead, lifeless and beyond hope.

And now, I have been coming face to face with the 2nd Commandment...relationship with others. And it terrifies me! "Love others as yourself." WOW...cool stuff, but like a toddler just introduced to strained peas...I'm grimacing and gagging just a bit. Only because, I am discovering that I really don't do relationship well. I'm trying to remember, but did that get checked on my Elementary report card "Plays well with others"?

Inevitably, I am sure that somehow, as I say "Yes" to God, that He will place me in situations that will grow and stretch me.

I John 4:20-20 (Message) says, "If anyone boasts, "I love God," and goes right on hating his brother or sister, thinking nothing of it, he is a liar. If he won't love the person he can see, how can he love the God he can't see? The command we have from Christ is blunt: Loving God includes loving people. You've got to love both."

But I don't hate...right?!? Well, that's something I am working out with the HS, as He deals with my heart. What challenges me is this: How can I love God (rightly) when I can't see Him, and not love others, whom I see in the natural. I interact with them in so many ways: attend church, work, drive by, eat next to, speak with, and so on...but somehow the value is lost. This is not where I want to be.

Misty Edwards sings about the inside, outside, upside-down kingdom. The Kingdom of God...where I pray His will and purpose be done on Earth, as in Heaven. Well...here it is...His plan and purpose pulling me inside out.

Thank you, Father for fully loving me! I come, humbled and broken to you! Perfect me in love!